In Which the Snake Pisses Off More Members of Her Sex
March 8, 2006
4:17 p.m., MT
Sunni's Mood: grouchier

Dear girls, grrls, ladies, women, womyn, chicks, etc.:

If you really, truly want to be taken seriously by a man -- or any person who uses a fair portion of his or her brain, for that matter -- there are certain things you should do, and other things you should not do.

Using sex as a weapon, or just threatening to withhold sex to get what you want, is in the no-no category.

Gloating about it to another chick, or encouraging it in another -- same category. You are not awesome, you do not rock; you're acting more like a spoiled child than a mature individual and you may think that's an appropriate way to treat someone you love, but I find it highly offensive. Bye-bye from my blogroll!

Normally I don't care about the stupid things other individuals do to themselves or amongst themselves, but I've had some unhappy dealings with some gents who've had extensive dealings with individuals like you, and I don't appreciate it. If I've been a manipulative cunt to someone, then I've earned whatever I get in return. But I try really hard not to be one, and I don't appreciate being treated like one because you've poisoned the well.

Oh, and here's a bonus English lesson, just because I'm feeling snarkily generous today: the spelling of the term is "wiles".

Sunni

Comments: 3 people have contributed to the conversation

On Wednesday, March 8th, at approximately 6:01 p.m. Mountain time, Jorge said:

Sunni, you have a talent for oblique references! I admit to being very curious about the post that inspired you to write this.

However, if some men you have dealt with extrapolated a negative relationship into "all women are evil" or a rough equivalent, I'd say the main problem lies with the man.

Individuals are different. If someone can't recognize that, they have a problem.

On Wednesday, March 8th, at approximately 6:19 p.m. Mountain time, Sunni said:

Well, it really isn't worth seeing; just a brief mention of the sex-as-weapon tactic. But that's something that redlines me pretty much instantly.

I agree with you that extrapolating from one to all isn't a good idea; I've had some encounters where that seems to have been the dynamic, but others weren't exactly like that. More likely, the guy is simply pre-emptively defensive, trying to interpret innocuous comments and inferring motives that I simply don't have (manipulation being a common one). My guess is that some guys may not even recognize that they're doing this.

On Thursday, March 9th, at approximately 5:38 a.m. Mountain time, Jorge said:

Hmmm, I read the piece. To me it looks like a straight forward case of prostitution. Woman wants a red car, man wants sex. No red car, no sex.

I agree that it doesn't say anything good about the woman since it seems to have been done within the context of an established relationship, but can't really see anything immoral with it. The man has the option of terminating the relationship. In fact I think he should give that option serious consideration. At the very least let the woman know that this type of dealing puts the relationship in jeopardy.

Of course this implies someone who has a good deal of self confidence, but if not he has other problems as well.

Which brings up another question: Do you want to have a relationship with someone who would acquiesce to such a demand?

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